ive been staying busy and not busy...all at once. i'm in this weird funk right now, and its hard to always see a way out of it. im doing a bunch of smaller jobs that i really like. however, i dont feel alot of passion in any of them. i would trade them for one thing that i really had passion about. i wish that i could find something, but i dont seem to have much success, and that scares me. i work at hjem (fun), i teach at nwacc and phoenix (good for the checkbook and brain), i sew (fun and rewarding), and i write and do the radio show (which is there to hopefully open doors for me in the future). the problem is, i dont see any doors opening, and it puts me in this real funk.
add to all of this...our friends just keep moving. some go to tulsa, some are in chicago, some are in florida, some are in new york, some moved to little rock, hell some moved to africa (although for some reason, i guess we have been blacklisted by them). it just a weird spot to be in and im afraid of getting into too deep into a dark place and not being able to find my way out.
i dont know...
sure i have been teaching and working at hjem. things are actually fine there. however, i just feel likeim wanting something more. its a wierd feeling because i shouldnt really have anything to bitch about. house is good, pups are good, d is good...but as the days get longer and longer...i have more and more time to think about things.
its just a wierd funk...
love to all, wayne:)
anyway, i thought id share some exciting news. my column for the fayettevilleflyer.com is being turned into a weekly segment on KUAF/NPR's "ozarks at large." it debuted this morning and will run most tuesdays. hope you enjoy my take on all things culture. we start with a discussion of the oscar nominations. enjoy (and come back on tuesdays to kuaf.org).
this really upsets me for a variety of reasons. i gave a huge portion of my time and energy to the opening of this location this year. more so, i really loved working there and think this kind of decision just blows. especially on christmas week. now i am saddened and scared as to what i am going to do, when the holidays finally do go. not to mention...i am prone to depression after the holidays end...so i am meeting this with extreme sadness.
this whole year has been a roller coaster and a year full of lessons. my love for daniel, our house, and our little dog charlee grew and grew. i couldn't ask for a more supportive and kind person than daniel. there have been so many days where he has lifted me up when i was at my darkest points. this year also saw the addition of harper to our house. he is our newest little dog and has taken his place alongside of charlee...as rulers of the house. we are so blessed to have them both.
in march, i lost my job of four years with doubletree/hilton. it was a bit of a shock, but not devastating...as that job was sucking the life out of me. the adjustment period after it, however, was hard. after a few weeks...your "to do" list becomes very thin. in this economy, you suddenly realize that you cannot simply go out and find something new. therefore, i built a bit of a portfolio, working on websites, helping out friends...and of course, teaching. this year has seen me teach for both northwest arkansas community college and university of phoenix. both posts have offered me a chance to get back in the classroom...and kept me busy.
in april, i was approached to start working with brick house (see how that turned out)...and also got some pretty shocking news. jessica, lance, and sarah d. have always been our best friends in the area. lance and sarah shared in april their plans to move back to tulsa and have a baby (and wedding). this was a rough period for me...and still stings a bit. i love cadence (the now born little guy) and the wedding was great...but there were so many challenges with the loss of close friends. we see them every month or so...but its simply different, in a time when i needed stability.
jessica is doing good. family and friends all seem to be good. a few new friends have even worked into the fold. however, this year will end in a state of unease. it was a year of change. a year of great and sad things. a year that tested me (and a huge chunk of america) in ways i could have never predicted.
so its been crazy lately. im teaching multiple sections this semester at the local community. however, the big news is that the cafe that i help coordinate servie for has finally opened. it has been quite a process. i work early in the morning (think 5:30 am) until late at night (with class). therefore...it been crazy busy. however, i couldnt let another day go by without sharing our pictures from thanksgiving and christmas. the house looks fantastic for the holiday. love wayne:)
pay special attention to the adorable lobster at the beginning. thats right...that would be charlee...now local media celebrity, trick or treating on the fayetteville square. sadly, harper in his equally adorable headless horseman didnt make the cut.
of course...no mention of halloween would be complete without photos from the month of october around our house (including d's birthday etc.)